Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Hyde Beach - Over the top Prices, but Still Keeping Things Classy


For every WMC, I try to plan a venue with that’s considered the latest and greatest hotspot. Last year it was the Arkadia pool, this year it had to be Hyde Beach at the SLS Hotel which had its very first year of WMC pool parties.

The Afrojack "Kings of Ace" pool party brought a slew of dutch electro artists to the lineup including a few tech house acts as well. Knowing that drink prices are expensive in Miami at the top notch places, we came prepared with flasked sunscreen bottles of vodka to sneak in. The only problem was that all of us were wearing string bags, which for some god awful reason this particular place does not allow. In fact my whole time here, it felt like SLS just wanted to find ridiculous ways to make their patrons less welcomed and up their douche factor by making up rules on the fly.

The crew at Hyde Beach, special thanks Baha Hallaby

So after scrambling around, Mike, myself, Gio, Chirag and our lovely rager Canadia lady friends were on our way in. I manage to get at least one screen bottle snuck in through the single pocket of my board shorts. Michelle, one of our Canadia friends brought some of her north of the border magic and managed to sneak in a bag of chips in a full sized grocery bags. If we knew better, we would've had her help us start a picnic in there.

Mike wasn't able to sneak much in, so he ends up ordering the very first drink at the bar. Needless to say, his reaction to the bill was all I needed to hear. $52 for two Vodka redbulls. Wow! I thought LIV Nightclub was outrageous, but these guys take it to the top for a day party.

The weather was highly unstable, so there was the occasional rain that would come and go. Michelle, Liv (our other lovely Candia friend) and I found some comfortable refuge in the euro style salted and heated side pool. This isn't the main pool facing the stage, but one off the side for relaxation and fun in the sun. Even though the drink prices were outrageous, Hyde Beach was the only close to Vegas pool experience I got during my entire WMC. I never got in the water again the rest of my trip at any other pool parties.


As the day wore on, the DJs came after one another. The ones left over to rage in the rain were the true WMC enthusiasts that came to support their artists. I was there during R3hab's set, and I believe I missed Afrojack by an hour. This is a typical dilemma that happens during a week of pool and night club raging. I just had to leave at a decent time so I can get to my next party. Maybe next year I will plan an entire day around Hyde Beach because this venue delivers, with ridiculous prices and all.


Mekka Miami - The Red Headed Stepchild Club

After finding out at 9am that the cover was $80 at Space, we were looking for a budget party since were coming off an epic show from Ferry vs Markus at Mansion and we might only have an hour or two of rage left in us. We walked by the parking lot of Mekka and saw a ton of Orange Mekka wristbands on the floor. I randomly decided to pick up one up and used the sticky side to keep it together. All of my friends did the same, infact one of them had a generic Orange wristband which had no logo what so ever. So we walk up to the dark entrance which wasn't even a door, it was just a ripped black sheet they used as a curtain. The security points us in the direction to get our wristbands checked. The guy glances at it and just tells us all to walk in. Boom we just saved cover. 

So the dance floor is dark, almost like a crypt. I noticed they pump fog on there to make it even darker so you would have trouble seeing the girl's faces. There were about 12 girls and 3-4 guys to the sides like sharks trying to swoop up on them. I couldn't see the girl's faces to confirm that they weren't trannies, but they were all wearing tight pants so atleast I can be sure they are post-op. 
The bar serves drinks in small plastic cups. Like the ones you use as a rinse cup at Motel 6. The first one I bought I set it on a box. When the bass dropped the cup flew off and I lost a full drink. Turns out that box where people pass out on was a subwoofer. 

There was a couch which apparently is the "gay zone". There were 6 guys sitting very close to each other. I walked by and one of the random ones there offered me a cigarette to start a conversation. "No thank you."

Mike B said from last year that he never found the bathroom. So I put myself on this quest to find this secret bathroom. There are 6 doors labeled as 'Exits' in this club. 1 is the first entrance you walked in which you will lose clearly since the lay out is like a haunted Halloween maze. Then there are 4 more which apparently they use some ply wood to jam it so you won't be able to open it. Then there was this last entrance next to back bar where I see a security guy in a red Mekka shirt passed out on the chair. This door leads to the bathroom. 

So I walk into the guys bathroom, and the first thing I see is an attendant sitting on a chair, but his head is actually in one of the sink and hes passed out sleeping or throwing up, who knows. I guess I won't be getting my hands dry if I decide to wash my hands. Then one of the stall doors open, and 5 guys rush in. They spend a good 10 minutes in there sniffing around, so I finally gave up and decided to pour my flask out in the open next to the urinals. I got my drink made and walked out of there. Weirdest bathroom experience ever. 

The night continued with countless randoms coming in. Some getting scared immediately and leaving, others staying there to continue their rage well into the afternoon of the next day. I spent a total of 2 hours there just watching the DJ drop some epic minimal techno and tech house tracks. Then I look back at the crowd and their reaction never changes. Just standing around like zombies and doing the same moves over and over again. I finally decided to call it a night.. or day at about 11:30. I ended up taking the bus across the block because cabs don't stop infront of Mekka. All in all it was a surreal experience, and I see myself coming back here again next WMC.